Pastors As Punching Bags!

It is ironic that in the Bible, a woman was caught in adultery.

Adultery is committed by two people, but we saw only the woman about to be publicly executed.

Some theologians suggested that what Jesus bent down to write on the floor when the case was brought to him was "Where is the man?"

One does not commit adultery alone, and it is not right that two people will commit adultery and only one will be punished.

It is also possible that the person she was committing adultery with ran away, and her husband was the one who caught her and decided to throw her at the mercy of the mob in search of justice.

The problem remains the same.

Two people cannot commit a crime, and only one ends up getting punished while the other gets shielded, protected, or remains at large.

The same scenario has played out in recent times in modern-day social media-induced Christianity.

A man and a woman commit sexual immorality with each other

The woman comes online to cry when the relationship goes bad, and suddenly the man is the one we all drag to the abattoir to be slaughtered.

I mean, I saw it LIVE in the case of a prominent minister who was unmarried but was "dating" one female actress.

The relationship went sour, and the man moved on with another woman

Suddenly, the scorned woman set up ring lights and began to malign the character of this man.

She talked about things that they did together (allegedly) in private.

Things that adult men and women do every day all over the world, as expected of their age and biology.

The only reason that the woman set up the ring light was that the man was a "Pastor"

If he was a banker, an engineer, a security guard, a police man or a soldier, she wouldn't have set up the ring light even if the man was a fellow believer.

The higher standard that we insist on, especially pertaining to sexual interaction between adult men and women, was not meant to entrap pastors and make them victims of unstable and scheming women. But in recent years, this has been the case.

Even in marriages. A wife does something, her husband complains because the thing was wrong, and the wife replies with, "You are a pastor; you cannot lose your temper, and you cannot talk to me like that even though I have done what I am not supposed to do"

So a pastor has become everybody's soft target. The one that every woman out there believes has something to lose in the court of public opinion and could easily be blackmailed into submission by the scorned girlfriend and the controlling wife.

As somebody who has worked in Christian ministry for several years, I have seen the suffering many pastors are enduring in the name of "if I lose my wife, I will lose my ministry".

Wives who know that the policy of the church is "A man who cannot control his own home should not be allowed to control the church"

Once the women realised how much the ministry meant to the man, they went berserk!

I know one who has been cheating on her husband constantly with different men for the past twelve years. The husband had to make a deal with her that whenever she wanted to do her thing, she should please take it far away from their local area and church environment because the first two people she cheated with were the husband's senior pastors in two different churches.

When she was asked why she was cheating on her husband, she said: "He is too docile, I am attracted to authoritarian figures, men who are assertive and controlling".

If you know this man is too gentle and docile, why did you marry him?

Why didn't you marry a choleric so that you could stay subservient to him?

The only reason she is still married to this man was because the man is a PASTOR and he does not want to lose his ministry for a crime his wife is committing.

Women target pastors, especially the rich and popular ones.

I remember the case of the stripper lady who came out on camera to attack a pastor some years ago, only to beg for forgiveness after the man acted promptly to lock her up for defaming him.

Pastors should not be our punching bags. Only cruel people attack the weak. This is why it is women who attack pastors the most in this world.

Cruelty is the expression of the weak.

Dominance is the expression of the strong.

When women ministers have sex with male members and then break up with them when things don't work out, the men don't set up ring lights or go on social media to cry foul.

They may talk about it at local pubs among friends but never with the intention of dragging the woman to the public square for execution.

Women, however, play victim even after they had initiated and instigated the whole relationship and the sex within it. Once the man wakes up from their seduction and refuses to be manipulated any longer, they destroy him using his ministry.

I remember a young pastor who added his fiancée to the ministry as they were working towards getting married.

The mother of the fiancé called her and told her to tell her man to get a job because depending on ministry work alone will not give them the resources to get married on time.

The lady called her man and told her what her mother said. The young man said no.

The lady got on the ministry's WhatsApp group and wrote all sorts (nothing sexual in their case, thank God), but many intimate things that she couldn't have known about him and his family out of anger.

The brother lost many members.

It made me instruct all the young men in ministry at the time and to date not to add their intended to their ministry platforms until they had gotten married, and even then they have to be sure that the woman had the maturity and the presence of mind not to destroy their hard work on a whim.

Pastors should not be treated this way.

I am not absolving pastors of wrongdoing in any way. There are shepherds who fleece the sheep, and they ought to be dealt with appropriately.

If a pastor did you wrong and you have proof, write a petition to his church headquarters with your proof.

Church headquarters always act swiftly on such matters.

Of what use is bringing the issue to social media?.

To the pastors, defend yourselves!

Defend your calling and defend your ministry.

The best form of defence is attack, so attack any woman who might be trying to come into your space for sexual relationships or out of desperation to find a husband or a star to sleep with.

Give them no room! Don't counsel, comfort, cry with them or entertain them in any way.

Treat them with derision, and under no circumstances should you fall for their schemes.

The second form of attack is exposure. Keep a record of every chat message, video call and meeting. Keep a journal with the names of all the ladies hovering around you clearly spelt out with date and time.

"So and so bumped into me at the camp today at noon; this is the fifth time we are accidentally meeting. I had to tell her to stop, and I hope she will listen"

"Such and such said she would like to come to my house to clean and cook for me. I told her I would report her to her mummy if she kept at it"

If anyone sends you a nude, open a folder under the person's name and keep it there (don't delete).

If she asks you for money and you sent it to her, keep the receipt in the same folder.

Keep a record.

In all the cases I have handled in which the man had evidence, the accuser chickened out when the evidence was brought to the fore.

You must suspect everybody until they prove to you that they are not a danger to you. The thing with women is that most of them do not mean you any evil from the outset, so nothing was premeditated. However, as they draw close and become familiar with you, the thin line between love and hate could get crossed easily, and this is what you want to guard against.

A pastor's wife died. A month later, the population of the church quadrupled to the extent that they started running three services.

The pastor was quite rich, and single women looking to marry him flocked to the church in their hundreds.

Some of them did not rely on prayer and make-up alone to catch his attention.

Some flocked to his office and began to bribe his PA's and drivers, etc

The poor man was still in mourning!

Prophecies of "thus says the Lord, he shall be my husband began to fly everywhere. In the prayer department, their most received prayer requests were "When our pastor shall remarry, may he remarry the right woman who God has sent to do the work of ministry with him"

When the pastor noticed what was going on, he realised he needed to get a wife because his status had unsettled the female folk.

He got married secretly and brought the new wife to church one Sunday without prior announcement.

He married the woman from another denomination.

After that service, we suddenly heard someone screaming, "They are not spirit-filled in this church; there are many here with unclean spirits who call themselves ministers and pastors. People should leave this church as soon as they can. The spirit of God has departed from this place. How can God tell me someone is my husband and the person has gone on to marry another? Are these people serious with God? Do they know who I am and what God has told me he sent me to do over this church?"

The woman went on and on.

She wanted to marry the pastor.

The pastor got married to another woman.

Suddenly, the pastor is fake, and his ministry is evil.

Learn a lesson from this.

Above all, keep your conduct clean and without blemish at all times as expected of a child of God.

As every other person who is a Christian should also do.

We cannot both be "born again", but the rules of engagement apply only to one because he has the "title of pastor".

Be wise, Be Gentle!

-GSW-