Costly Relationships

Costly Relationships

Costly Relationships


You will know why the scriptures made it clear that you should not be unequally yoked with unbelievers when you find yourself right in the middle of the foolishness perpetrated by unbelievers, which to them seems like wisdom.

Unfortunately, they will not perpetrate this foolishness alone so that they can bear the consequences alone. They will drag you right into the midst of it.

Simply because you exist and you allowed yourself to be available in their space at the time they desired to execute their "wise" plan, which will surely boomerang and become an issue for everybody

Take, for example, a man who suddenly decided he was travelling abroad to live a better life

You knew it was a bad idea from the beginning, and you told him so, but he had seen going abroad as the next best thing to making heaven without tasting death.

He went on with it until the point when he had to show proof of funds.

You thought to yourself, surely he or she would turn back from this foolish venture now, but no, he doubled down and began a borrowing spree from loan apps.

He believes that once he gets abroad, he will automatically become rich and pay back all his debts in the twinkling of an eye.

Unfortunately, the foolish plunges into things without any consideration of the consequences.

He also drops your name as his next of kin and guarantor for the loans

He did this because you are wise, you save your money, and he knows about it

He feels he is not borrowing money from you directly; he is just using you as a cover until he reaches his destination and produces the goods.

Loan apps begin to harass you, and you end up settling his debts because of your integrity.

When fools make a plan, the wise inevitably get dragged into it

A sister is desperate to get married

She even goes ahead to set herself a time frame

"I will be married in six months", she says

Then she meets a man, and they begin to talk

She was impatient to get to the altar.

You see the rush, and you tell her, why are you rushing? What is the hurry?

She says, "I made a covenant with God that I will be married in 2024 and that my marriage will be before June."

You say, "Rushed marriages don't last; you must wait to get to know this man."

She says "Yes sir" and then sends you a wedding IV the following day

She then proceeds to write you an official letter asking you to be the officiating minister for the day

"We would like you to join us together" the letter reads

You know she is leveraging on your "anointing" to make the marriage a success

You laugh at the ingenuity

Three months later, the marriage crashes

It is your fault because you never wanted the union in the first place because you didn't pray for them as you ought to or didn't believe in them as a couple.

Your words of caution have somehow become a statement of disbelief or a vote of no confidence.

It is always what it is with a fool.

A wise man will conceive a plan and execute it without dragging others into it.

All you see at the end of it is the bigger picture, which was brought out of wisdom.

A fool is always going to drag others into a cesspool of his or her making

He or she is always banking on others to bail him or her out of a pit, which he or she will dig with his or her own hands while both eyes are open and the brain is functioning.

What a fool regards as wisdom is abject foolishness, and always by the fruit of the foolish, you know him or her.

Lot was with Abraham right from the beginning

As Abraham prospered, Lot also prospered

Lot assumed he prospered because he was smart

He didn't have any relationship with God that he could count on as the reason for his success.

He prospered by association.

One day, his men and Abraham's men fought over the resources available to feed their livestock.

The fight was bitter and bloody

Abraham got there and saw the damage done

He sent for Lot and asked that Lot take responsibility for the actions of his men.

Lot felt Abraham was using undue seniority to oppress him

His livestock must feed, and his men were only doing their job

Lot raised his voice to his brother.

Abraham felt Lot was an ingrate and unduly rude to him

Abraham felt it was better to part ways with Lot to risk another clash between the two of them

Lot agreed

Abraham asked Lot to choose a portion of the field for his men and livestock.

Lot chose the green fields and left


Genesis 13

So Abram said to Lot, “Let’s not have any quarrelling between you and me or between your herders and mine, for we are close relatives. Is not the whole land before you? Let’s part company. If you go to the left, I’ll go to the right; if you go to the right, I’ll go to the left.”

Lot looked around and saw that the whole plain of the Jordan toward Zoar was well watered, like the garden of the Lord, like the land of Egypt. (This was before the Lord destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah.) So Lot chose for himself the whole plain of the Jordan and set out toward the east. The two men parted company: Abram lived in the land of Canaan, while Lot lived among the cities of the plain and pitched his tents near Sodom.

The Lord said to Abram after Lot had parted from him, “Look around from where you are, to the north and south, to the east and west—all the land that you see I will give to you and your offspring[a] forever. I will make your offspring like the dust of the earth so that if anyone could count the dust, then your offspring could be counted. Go, walk through the length and breadth of the land, for I am giving it to you.”

So Abram went to live near the great trees of Mamre at Hebron, where he pitched his tents. There, he built an altar to the Lord.


After Lot left, Abraham felt very bad.

How could his nephew, whom he raised like a son, behave that way to him?

As he was thinking about it, the voice of God came to him

God encouraged Abraham to let go of the pain and see the brightness of his future

God gave him the whole land and also spoke forth that the children of Abraham shall be as numerous as the dust of the entire earth

Unfortunately, this was the last time we saw Lot's riches in terms of men and livestock

Once the relationship he had with Abraham got severed, he began a disastrous journey that led to the loss of everything he had until he was reduced to just himself and his two daughters some years later

Lot never saw the folly of his ways

Lot never returned to Abraham to apologise and continue their partnership

A wise man would have noticed the trend and turned around as soon as he could, but Lot was not a very wise man

He lost all his properties, began to live in Sodom and Gomorrah and got carried away in a battle

Abraham had to risk everything he had to rescue his nephew from his captors

God came down with two angels in Genesis 18; they had a meal with Abraham on their way to Sodom and Gomorrah

Abraham again had to intercede for Lot so that God could spare him and his family

The wise is constantly drawn into the drama of the decisions of the fool

A wise man who accommodates a set of belief systems developed by foolish people will inevitably act foolishly

A foolish man who accommodates a set of belief systems developed by wise people will inevitably act wisely

This means both wisdom and foolishness can be learned

The prayer of the wise and the prayer of the foolish can also be identified when articulated

The wise prays wisdom

The foolish is known for vain repetition

The wise take responsibility

The foolish blames everyone for everything

The wise dominates

The foolish is subdued

The wise is on the front foot

The foolish is constantly reacting to onslaughts

The wise sees ahead

The foolish are continually being drawn out of ditches

The wise is open to knowledge

The foolish believe they know all there is to know already

The judgment of the wise is fair

The foolish are constantly being judged