Moving In with Her?

I saw throughout last week an argument on X from different people trying to choose a side in the debate on either it is okay for a man to move in with his woman or if it is better for a woman to move in with her man.

I couldn’t post anything in support or against it because it all depends on the individuals involved.

There is no general rule as to who should move into the house or who when it comes to marriage.

The traditional mindset is that the woman should move into the property of the man.

This approach is best for all concerned because the man has an obligation to provide accommodation for his bride.

The woman however does not have this obligation.

If she has bought a house before she met you and she opened her door to you to move in with her, you must do this based on the kind of woman you are with

You must also have a bit of a thick skin especially if she had been living in that house as a spinster and she is well known in that estate or area before you moved in

People will talk and it won’t be nice talk.

Men and women react in different ways when they are hurting or during a fight or a breakup

Most men would not throw their woman out of the house because of a minor misunderstanding

In many cases, a man would even move out of his own house for a woman for a while until she is ready to move out in case of a breakup

This is not the same with a woman you are living with.

If there should be a parting of ways, the man will be wise to move on immediately or be willing to beg and make amends

If however, she is the one who fell out of love with you and in love with someone else, you will be difficult to explain to the new person

A man can meet a new lady, fall in love with her and still explain to her that he had an ex living in his crib who is trying to sort herself out.

If he is sincere and the lady could see it, she would allow him room to tidy up his past without any rancor.

Where you are in life also matters. As a man, if you are drowning in the waters of life, you must be willing to cling to anything that could keep you afloat in order to survive.

There is no sight as silly as that of a poor man with a huge ego.

Such men end up as nothing at the end of the day.

A man going somewhere will be pragmatic enough to assess himself, adapt to his situation and master it so that he can move to the next level in life.

David received help from Abigail when he had to.

The spies also received help from Rehab when they had to

The problem is becoming entitled or even lashing out under the weight of your ego as a man to become emotionally and/or physically abusive to your host because you are at her mercy

You can always discuss a system in which you pay her rent even though you are living in her house, if this will make you feel more comfortable and less like a leech

Many men are married and in very difficult financial seasons, their wives go all out to source for and pay the rent.

It is normal for couples to bear each other’s burdens

It becomes a problem when either party begins to take the other for granted.

Finally, if you approach a man or lady to take you in because you have accommodation issues and he or she does so.

Don’t take advantage of proximity to convert squatting to becoming landlord or landlady

If you return the favor with sex, the relationship is classified as transactional

-GSW-