The Backstabber

Brother Gbenga,

As i read your story titled Rat Fink, I cried
I didn't cry like those sophisticated white
people with royal blood who must mop each
teardrop with a fine well-perfumed handkerchief
I cried like one who had lost a loved one
I cried like Peter did after he betrayed Jesus
I wept like a baby
The Story was written with me in mind
You see I had a friend and a brother while
I was in the University
He was an answered prayer for me in the
time of need
He was very generous and loving
He was the kind of brother who could give
you his eyes if you asked for it
He taught me a lot of things
We shared the same bunk
He listened to me talk about my relationship
issues and gave me counsel
I did the same for him
We were very close
Both of us were believers and we spent
several hours praying in the spirit together
He was a blessing to me
In order to understand what happened
between us, I will like to give you some
background about me
I am from a very conservative background
I had a Holiness movement indoctrination
I know what sin was
I avoid sin at all cost
I grew up like this and I must confess it gave
me a degree of self-righteousness and a
hardened heart
For me, things are always black or white
This brother was quite the opposite
He was very free, too free
He related with ladies freely
Though he wasn't sleeping with them or
anything like that but I was uncomfortable
with it
Give ladies an inch and they will take a mile
I have sisters, younger sister and older sisters
I have a mother and i have female cousins and
other relatives
Ladies never want to get anything done for
themselves as long as they know someone
who is willing and ready to do it for them
I know this for a fact
If you present yourself as available and idle
a lady around you will get you something
to do
It is their nature to use and take advantage
I told him this several times
I told him ladies were a slippery slope
I told him ladies will ruin his destiny
He simply ignored me and related with
everybody as if we all have clean hearts
and a pure heart
The fact that he was very intelligent was
also a magnetic factor for ladies
He was the most sought after "student" I know
When we got to 300 level he was made
an executive of our campus fellowship
His popularity was a strong factor
and so was his spirituality
I began to resent him
He was doing the work of God carelessly
in my opinion
There was a way a religious leader ought to
comport himself 
There was supposed to be some social
distance, some spiritual aura
He disregarded all these and acted as if
he was just an ordinary guy
You will see him having lunch with students
in 100 level, talking with a group of ladies
alone without any consciousness of who
he was or who he was representing
I and three other friends decided
to intervene
We saw an opportunity when we were invited
bu another campus for a Word Retreat
When we got to that campus, we sat him
down and talked to him
He was acting more like a celebrity than
a Christian
His phone does not stop ringing
He was acting like the people's man
These were not Christian characteristics at all
We have heard of ladies fighting over
him in the female hostel
We knew he wasn't dating anybody but
his conduct left room for such assumptions
by some ladies who had attached themselves
very close to him
He listened to us as we presented our case
When we were done, he said, You do not
understand the gospel
And then he walked out
It was the most arrogant thing i have ever seen
Was the gospel winning and dinning with
all sorts
Didn't the scripture say "Be ye separate"
and "Come out from among them?"
As soon as he left the room, we decided 
we would have to elect someone else
as our fellowship president in the next
election
But for him to be disqualified from the
presidency would be a herculean task
He was by far the most qualified and
the most desired for the position
The outgoing president had him penciled
down already
There were eight of us in that meeting
We agreed we needed sanity
The fellowship would not be destroyed
in our own time
He was going to turn the fellowship into
a club for all we care
The handwriting was on the wall
All the ladies of questionable character on
campus flock around him
Sometimes when we get to our fellowship
secretariat, we would see them there
waiting for him or talking to him
It was a shame
It was a desecration and he was not
the president yet
He was the fellowship's drama coordinator
We had to stop the rot
We couldn't really find any fault except
his seeming lack of regard for our religious
code of conduct
We prayed for God's guidance and 
began to seek a way to disqualify him
A few weeks later, his mother was traveling
to Ireland to help his older sister nurse
her newborn baby
He invited me to their house
He had an older brother who was not
mentally stable
He needed someone to help watch his
brother while he would follow his mother
to the airport
The plan was to then take the brother 
to a relative and return to school the
next day
I went to his house and met with his family
He and his mother set off for the airport
by 2pm
I stayed with his brother
We watched the premier league and talked
His brother was very nice and jovial
His mood was unpredictable and sometimes
he would wander off if unsupervised by 
an adult
Later that evening, while his brother slept
I decided to pray
I walked into a room and found Marijuana
on the table
It was much, in a newspaper, with rizla
and lighter
It was there, lying in the open for all to 
see
I saw a Bible, the free NIV copy lying
on the same table
How can someone who is a believer come
from such a house
How can I tolerate or pretend that I didn't
see what I have seen
I brought out my phone and started
taking pictures
I took quite a lot of pictures
Enough was enough!
He returned the following morning, he settled
the other affairs and we returned to school
When we got to school I called another
member of the fellowship and showed him the
pictures
He told me it would be best if we made
a scandal of it through one of the campus
newspapers
I told him I dont want it to be known
that the pictures came from me
He said it wouldn't be a problem
I transferred the pictures to him
Later that evening, the chaplain of the
school sent for me
He told me he had been shown some
pictures
He said he had stopped the pictures
from being published
A scandal will do the fellowship no good
He told me he would handle the issue
but i must delete all the pictures
I said YES Sir!
He asked me to tell him what I saw
and I lied
I said while I was sleeping in his house
I heard a noise
I went to see what was going on and i
saw Him and His brother smoking the 
marijuana in the dead of the night
(Brother Gbenga, it slipped out of my
mouth sir, I didn't plan to say anything
like that! I think it occurred to me that
unless I can attach him to the Marijuana
the chaplain wouldn't take the issue
seriously, so I embellished the facts
devilishly)
The chaplain thanked me and told me to
write a statement to this effect
i did this without thinking beyond that
moment
A week later, the chaplain made his move
He said he was led to reconstitute the
fellowship
He suspended the fellowship executive body
I was appointed the Acting Fellowship
President and the other members of
my team were appointed into offices
as well
We were assigned the task of running
the fellowship until the end of the
session!
It was a closet coup!
Later that evening, he walked into the
room and congratulated me heartily
He was that kind of person
A man without guile
But the suspension was just the beginning
of his travails
He had no idea what hit him a few days
later when the Chaplain summoned him
and claimed he had information from a
reliable source that he was smoking
marijuana
Of course, he denied it
The chaplain told him to write a statement
stating what he knew about marijuana
He collected the paper and wrote nothing
He told me all these himself later that same
day when he got to the room
He was angry and wondered why the 
chaplaincy was picking on him and fabricating
stories
Two days later he got the SDC summons
I also got the summons
We got to the SDC at the same time
I kept pretending i didn't know why I was
summoned but I had an idea
He was accused of using Marijuana
He denied it
The SDC members produced pictures
i took
He said His brother was a marijuana addict 
and the room was his older brother's room
He spoke well and made a very convincing
argument until I was called in
He was asked if he knew me
He said yes
He was asked if he believed I was a liar
He said No
He was asked if he believed I have anything
against him
He said No
He was asked if He would consider me a
brother
He said Yes
Then I was asked if i saw him smoking Marijuana
and I said YES!
I had written a statement to that effect
and i couldn't change it anymore
He was suspended immediately!
I couldn't bring myself to look at him
I couldn't bring myself to think
It happened right after our examinations
He went home immediately and I went
home too
A week after the holidays began
at 9pm in the night
He came to our house with his mother
They wanted me to change the statement
The SDC's final seating was in a week
and he had been summoned for his verdict
His mother had made enquiries and had
been told everything hung on my testimony
That was why they came
His mother knelt down for me
My mother was shocked to see what
was going on 
It took my mother time to catch up with
the story
My mother promised his mother I would
change the story
My mother couldn't believe I was such
a backstabber
I tried to tell my mother I couldn't do that
without everything looking suspicious
My mother said I must change the
testimony
I said okay
I promised him and his mother that I
will show up at the SDC summons and
change my testimony
I did show up but I couldn't change it!
I had to swallow that bile!
Later that day he was expelled
The school gave him a condition for
redemption
He was to spend a session at the destiny
recovery centre of the school as a form
of rehabilitation
It was a lifeline
He shunned it
He just left.
Some months later he traveled to Ireland
This was in 2012
He had graduated and now lives in Ireland
He is even married with children
I recently concluded my Master's degree
I am married with children too
I have tried several times to reach out
to him and say sorry
I am wiser and I have come to understand
that I didn't do anything for the Lord 
I did everything for myself and I am sorry
I wish i could tell him and have him forgive
me
I wish I could give back what I took from
him
I am very sorry
This is why I weep, brother Gbenga
This is why I am weeping!

PS: This event happened in 2010 at
a Christian Denomination owned Private
University in Nigeria
I have reached out to the two brothers
The one in Nigeria and the other in Ireland
I spoke with both extensively
The spirit of Jesus is a spirit of forgiveness
We were baptized into the One who said 
"Father forgive them for they know not
what they do"
It was a very healthy and productive
conversation
I believe the issue of forgiveness has been 
settled!

GSW's Notes: Private Universities should
be wary of rushing to conclusions on
destiny altering issues
It is best to mould than to throw away
To heal than to cast away
Nothing is greater or of more value than a 
Human being
Every time we choose a thing above a person
we demean the whole purpose of God!
Man is God's crowning creation
Money, fame, position, religion, etc are
subject and holds no comparison to the
value of man!
For God so loved "mankind" that he gave
His only begotten son that whosoever
believeth in Him should not perish but
have everlasting life!
Jesus didnt die for religion or money
He gave his life for man!