What Do People Think Of Me?

Sometimes, we wonder how others perceive us. Perhaps we all want to be seen as nice, kind, or any other words associated with positive traits. And to be perceived the way we want, we often become extremely careful about how we carry ourselves in society.

We measure every interaction. We curate the stories we choose to tell so we won’t be labeled “too much” and we restrain ourselves from doing something silly because we fear being seen as weird.

But no matter how carefully you present yourself, there will always be someone who misunderstands you.

Someone might think you are shy simply because you are the quietest person in the room. But maybe you are dealing with personal struggles and still choosing to show up, while all you are really doing is being observant.

Someone might see you as lonely because you are not married at the age you are “supposed” to be (according to society’s timeline). What they do not know is that you are enjoying your singleness and you are surrounded by good people who make you feel loved.

However, there are also people who are inspired by your hard work and touched by your kindness. Then, they tell you how much your existence matters in their lives.

People hold different versions of you. Most of the time, their understanding of you is shaped by limited interactions and specific situations.

Instead of trying to change people’s opinions about you, use them as an opportunity to understand yourself better.

When someone says you are annoying, you can reflect on the situations in which they felt that way and assess yourself. However, that does not mean you should immediately blame yourself and think, “Oh, I shouldn’t speak too much!”

Because whatever labels people place on you do not reflect who you are as a person. You are not defined by those perceptions, but rather by how you grow as a human being. The way you change your views or outgrow versions of yourself that no longer align with what you believe. Most importantly, by the way you remain your authentic self, not performing for others just to gain their approval.

You don’t have to explain yourself every time someone misunderstands you. Sometimes, it’s useless.

Even when you have grown into a different version of yourself, some old school friends might be surprised and say, “Oh, you’re not that shy kid anymore?”

They only know the old version of you that still exists in their minds. They forget that people can change. Their opinions of you are not in your control and no matter how hard you try, there is no guarantee that they will change them.

If you crave being seen as good and becoming everyone’s favorite, let me tell you this: it’s a myth. No matter how genuine you try to be, there will always be someone who interprets you the wrong way. Even when you believe you are doing what must be done, some people may still see you as the villain.

Don’t shrink yourself just to fit into their comfort or to make sure people get the right idea of you. It is such a waste of energy when you have countless responsibilities in life that truly matter.

Let people perceive you however they want. Perhaps that is the price you pay for being seen and building human connection. But you can play your part; to live unapologetically and hold firmly to the values you believe in.

In short, whatever people think about you, let them live with those thoughts.